Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Killing Father Time

I'm learning (or at least realizing) just how time-driven our society/my life is, and I hate it.

In the three weeks I spent at Tauernhof's Upward Bound program this past summer, we weren't allowed watches while we were out on tour. It was awesome. Our leaders took care of waking us up and keeping us on schedule. We got up when someone yelled "Rise and shine! Brekky in half an hour!", we didn't know how many hours of sleep we got and didn't worry about it. Minutes were no longer important. Everything was somewhat flexible.

Now in contrast, these last two weeks of school would be fairly normal except that my church's annual Dessert Theatre production is next week - so, added on to the normal routine, I have to finish the lighting before this weekend and we have four performances next week. The last two weeks of school. Since my school schedule is pretty much a fourty-hour week, I usually do a bunch of homework on weekends. Now I have setup, dress rehearsals, and performances on weekends, on top of the usual midweek activites that take up a couple evenings.

I recalled this summer last week while putting together a robot during Lab - I happen to enjoy working on stuff like that and suddenly realized that I had been happily working on Olaf for an hour and a half (say that five times fast), oblivious to the rest of the world. That's when I realized I don't like time. Those three weeks with I spent mostly time independent and it was the proverbial breath of fresh air. (And I'm sure being in the Austrian Alps didn't have anything at all to do with it. ;) Regardless of where I am, I don't want to have to care so much about scheduling and time management and making sure I have enough time to do all my homework for PreCal. (And that's the kicker - I'm slightly behind and it's not because I don't understand the math. It just takes so much time to crank through all the problems.)

This is why I hate time: it waits for no-one, we can't kill it, all we can do is waste it (to borrow the cliches). But at the same time if we try to pack as much as possible into our minutes, we end up wasting ourselves instead. Which is really better?

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