Zoooming to Zooomr (Or: Another Lazy Title)

I'm definitely moving to Zooomr. It's a combination of things, really. The day after my previous post, Kris, The Developer of Zooomr (of all people) comments to let me know that I can get rid of that stinky numeric url and replace it with one of my choice. (That's what I call service.) Cool, and I'm an Idiot not to have seen the setting to do that. And then he tells me that the API is coming and he's already hacked jUploadr to work with Zooomr. Scrap the "no clients" argument.

And how cool is it that The Developer takes the time to talk to people like me? I like it when busy people make the effort to help like that.

So now the only thing I can really complain about is Google maps being dog slow over a modem connection. But that doesn't have anything to do with Zooomr. And Kris says there is more coolness around the corner, so count me in.

Maybe I'll Move to Zooomr

I'm not really unhappy with Flickr. Sure, they're big and slow (on a modem) and a little ugly, but it works and it's pretty slick, and I've got quite a few photos there. But when along comes this neat alternative called Zooomr that looks nicer, provides more better features (like geotagging, for one), and gives you more upload space and fewer restrictions for the same low price, what is one to do, eh?

Oh, the agony of decisions. So many things to consider. I've got a couple dozen photos I'll have to re-upload! I just got first Flickr comments today! Flickr lets me photoblog! I'm an Old Skool user, I don't use a stinkin' Yahoo ID! (Ha!) But Zooomr is cooler. Geotagging. And it looks nicer. But it has stinky numeric user URLs. [Edit: But you can change them! In your account settings. Thanks Kris.] And no upload clients yet.

Blasted Decisions.

Score! (The Maybe-Useful-Definitely-Geeky-Junk edition)

Talking Alarm Clock
Originally uploaded by The One True Stickman.

I think maybe I'll make this a regular feature thing. As regular as anything is around here, anyway. Sure it's just a chance to brag about the weird stuff I've picked up for cheap or free, but what are blogs for, anyway?

This edition brings you the Talking Alarm Clock, an ancient kit I found assembled and stuffed forlornly in a small cardboard box in the dark and dusty recesses of the back room at school. Mr. Feeney said to Deep-Six it, and I mused that, oddly enough, my basement is about that deep.

It's a neat find - it had all the paperwork with it, right down to schematics, construction notes, and board masks, and it still works despite being older than I am. (The papers are dated from 1983.) It's pretty easy to use, as well. The three push buttons are for Hour Set, Minutes Set, and Speak Time. You hold the set buttons and it counts, you let go when you get to where you want to be. Push the Speak button to hear the current time. Simple. The slide switches set the speak mode and alarm - one just turns on the alarm (the Time Set switches then set the alarm time) and the other two set the Speak mode: No auto, on the hour, quarter hour, or minute. Every minute gets pretty annoying.

It is, however, extremely, dorkily, geeky. When you plug it in a deep male voice jerkily proclaims:

"*boop* Power, failed. Set, the, time. Power, failed. Set, the, time."

When announcing the time a feminine voice says:

"Good evening, the time, is, nine, twenty, five, P, M."

Better yet, the alarm:

"*boop* (female voice) Good morning, the, time, is, six, forty, five, A, M. *boop* (male voice) Time, to, get, up. *boop*"

And it repeats that every minute until you shut it off. I guess it would probably do it's job.

I suppose one really can't expect too much more from eighty's vintage speech synthesis being run from a Z80 micro - you can only do so much at 2.5Mhz. At least the TMS5220 speech chip does have some inflection and isn't totally monotonal.

Score!

Poking my nose into Goodwill today in celebration of the start of break week, I stumbled across the greatest find of the month: an IBM Model M, the Keyboard Grail of Geekdom, for $1.99 (plus tax).

This is a keyboard such that it has spawned a loyal following, fanatics, even official reviews and instructions for care and feeding, and has been labeled the loudest, best, most solid and most likely to be used as an emergency office weapon. The very fact that ten or twenty-year-old keyboards would still be alive after that much abuse is amazing in itself, particularly given the life span of some more modern equipment.

I have entered the realm of the enlightened, bragging rights included. So what if mine is one of the later Blue Logo models made by Lexmark? It's still way cooler than anything else I've got.

Striving For Excellence In A Land Of Lowercase

IMspeek really bugs me. Why does everyone seem to think that capitalization, punctuation and spelling don't mean anything anymore? The rules and dots are there to bestow the language with order, reason and color.

Don't believe me? Here. Let me translate some of an old classic into the modern vernacular of IMers for you, with very sincere apologies to Shakespeare.

alonso87: dude they all fell asleep
alonso87: im tired to
bro_sebastian: go to bed man
4n70n10: yeah man      bro an ill watch 4 u
alonso87: bye
alonso87: zzzzzzz
bro_sebastian: OMG dude thats so weird they all just like conked out
4n70n10: LOL its the climate
bro_sebastian: yah but im not tired
4n70n10: me either
4n70n10: totally weird they just all fell over at once

Ok, enough of that torture. (It's from The Tempest, Act II, Scene I, by the way.) I think I can count on one finger the number of my friends who actually IM in fluent English. Hang on...I think I'm channeling the ancient spirit of superbob487... (above the whine of a certain William's coffin, which is rotating at a very high rate of speed right now)...

superbob487: LOL dude its all about like just talking not some english paper

Yeah, it's just talking, but what is talking about? Communicating, and you are communicating to me right now that you are too lazy to hit the shift key and put a little thought to what you're saying to me.

Think of it this way. A telephone is one step removed from real life - you can't see the other person's body language. IMs are one step removed even from that - you can't actually hear the other persons voice. (That's two steps from real life.) This makes it difficult at times to convey meaning - more specifically, the meaning we want - in what we write.

Now, comparing a book (The Tempest - a play, actually, but who cares) to a real-time communication device (like IM) is rather a stretch. Obviously the two have little in common aside from the words and communication bit. That's the important bit, however. Though a completely different method than books, IMs are still a medium for communication. More importantly, they are a form of interaction - like talking to someone. I don't know about you, but when I talk I don't do it in a flat monotone and I use various vocal inflections to convey my meaning.

Read that bit about our buddies on the island again, but try it out loud this time. (If you're in a library, just make sure you whisper.) If you read it right, it probably sounded flat and incredibly boring. If it sounded normal, you read it wrong. Remember: no periods no commas no pauses no taking a breath!

In writing, punctuation controls the flow of the words. Pauses..... dramatic... or dreamy... pauses..... can be had with merely a half-dozen (or fewer) presses of the period key. Just around the next comma, there awaits great adventure! Excitement! And colons! Remember this, kids: "Lack of punctuation, capitalization, and spelling inhibits comprehension." We'll review that later; now on to Capitals and Spelling.

Capitals mark important things, like places, titles, and Stuff that you want to Highlight. Beginnings of sentences. And sure, you ALL know about YELLING, but judicious use of that shift key really adds a lot of depth and class to simple sentences. Especially beginnings of sentences. Just that one capital letter can make writing easier to understand - not capitalizing takes away the visual definition and is harder for your brain to parse.

And spelling - spelling is one of the more nebulous ones. Your brain is really very good at fixing things and making it make sense, but there is no point in making it work harder than need be. Using regular spellings is easier to read and, as an added bonus, gives the appearance of being somewhat intelligent and capable of understanding multi-syllable words.

This isn't that hard, is it?

Now a brief spiel on acronyms. Acronyms to abbreviate common phrases are sort of like carrying a bunch of cardboard signs around my neck and holding up the one that says "LOL" whenever I hear something really funny. It might be faster than actually laughing, but it requires extra translation on the receiving end. Sure, I can translate it, but whenever I see "IMHO" my brain thinks it "Imho" and then has to go back and say "In my humble opinion". Communication is about getting your thought to the other guy, right? Anything that needs translation on the other end isn't communicating clearly.

Now one word on l33t 5p33k: Retarded. I refuse to go any further down that path. See also the last sentence of the previous paragraph.

Now that I have thoroughly lambasted all my friends (except one) and most of the rest of the universe under age 20 (except for probably a couple dozen), let me be the first to say that this whole post is rather...er, anal. You can sometimes leave off capitals without appearing totally dumb, and acronyms really do work if you're in a big hurry.

My point remains, however: Unless your house is burning down, there's no really good reason not to spend a couple extra seconds to type complete and properly formatted thoughts. Just remember this, kids: "Lack of punctuation, capitalization, and spelling inhibits comprehension." (And if your house IS burning down, what the heck are you typing for? Get out and call 911, for the love of Pete.)